A Slobber Slug is Born

If you haven't been privy to it already, here's your chance to get a little background information on my birth. I was born on Friday, March 13, 2009 @ 6:16 am. Despite this date, I am not a curse; I am an absolute blessing (or so Mommy and Daddy tell me). That's because, on this day, it became official; I was the largest and heaviest Slobber Slug to ever cross the earth (well, in at least the last 2 million years, or so).

At birth, I weighed in at 8 lbs. 2 oz, and was 21 in. long. I have since grown to over 20 lbs and 28 in. long.

My hair was raven black. It was abundant. I had it on my cone-shaped head (I was vacuumed, AND my dad has a slight cranial malformation), the back of my ears, and my back. Sadly, I have since shed my fur (Mephisto found it very becoming AND it would've come in very handy during this coming Halloween. On top of that, Mommy thought I would've been a shoo-in at the local circus and a real cash-cow. Sadly/happily, that was not my/our fate). I digress, for your information my hair has now changed colour, and is a sandy brown.

Upon delivery, my eyes shone like sapphires. Their deep blue hue complimented the red in the whites of my eyes that were a result of a few lengthy episodes of laughing so hard that I cried my eyes out for almost an hour straight. My eyes have since changed. They are now the colour of turds, or burnt toast if you prefer. Okay, okay, they're a lovely brown. What's awesome about having brown eyes is the fact that they match my Mommy's and my brother's (Mephisto's) eyes. Daddy is now the odd-man out. Not, that any of us are surprised. He usually is (his head IS malformed).

I almost forgot to tell you about the colour of my skin. When I arrived, my skin was the colour of urine when you haven't had an ounce of H2O in a week (or when you've had one too many bevies). I don't know what that last bracket means. My Mommy wrote that. Anyway, no one found my skin colour attractive. Thankfully, it has since changed to the alabaster skin my Mommy was gifted with. EVERYONE finds this attractive.

So, that's about all I have to say on this topic for now. Now that you've been updated, go on and read all about my life since. It's a real s(l)ob(ber) story!

Image (Above): This is me just a few days old. I came to Mommy and Daddy to have and hold. 10 little fingers. 10 little toes. A cute little face, with a scrunched up nose.